Wednesday, August 13, 2008


It’s hard to be so self-aware that we understand how other people see us. I was reminded of that (again) when working with a couple recently. I asked them each to say what they had heard the other say and to get as much as they could into their partner’s shoes in describing what they felt.

They tried; they really did, although it was a challenge for them. Three interesting things happened. One was that each of them described what they thought the other person said and felt with what seemed to be reasonable accuracy from what I had observed. The second thing was that both of them denied that they felt that way. As one said, “I don’t feel like that at all – at least I don’t think so.” The third thing that emerged was that, in turn, each later said that they did feel just as their partner had said, and hadn’t realized it.

It is quite amazing how accurately our innate sensors pick up on the feelings of others. Almost as amazing is how unaware we are of how we are feeling at any given time. We give out the signals quite sub-consciously, hoping, perhaps that someone else will pick up on them. The sad thing is that most people don’t know what to do with what they receive. All we know is that what you feel is what we get.
In peace
Congratulations to our latest Emotional Fitness Coach. Maria Schmid, who is also completing her training as a certified psychologist, is now licensed as an EFit Coach and is practicing in Calgary. Contact me now to find out how you can join Maria and the other certified Emotional Fitness Coaches wherever you are.
If you enjoyed Equilibrium of August 13, 2008 please reply with your comments or feedback. If you are sharing this with others please be sure to quote my name in full and my website Thank you.
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